This Disaster
by HEYUNLOVING
Summary: AU.Pov-Shikamaru.Shikaino.ShikaTemari.Shikamaru has a theory about girls:There all troublesome.One girl thinks he has crush on her and the other has no trouble bossing him around.with these two who needs a girl?Full summary inside.R


**A/n: **This story is going to be a side project among with my other story's. R&R and enjoy!

**Disclaimers**:_ I do not own Naruto or any characters._

**Summary: **AU. Pov-Shikamaru. Shikaino.ShikaTemari. Shikamaru has a theory about girls. There all troublesome, annoying and a bother. A girl hes been seeing, time and time keeps hitting on him because she thinks he has some crazy crush on her which is the total opposite. He thinks shes rude and pushy. Then he meets another girl. Shes staying with a friend of the family's in his small town while suspended from school. She has no trouble bossing him around and has the power to make him do whatever she wants. With two girls like this, why would he ever want a girlfriend?!

**This Disaster**

**Chapter one - Study and a phone call**

I would start off with telling you everything. From start to finish. About my whole life and the bumps it had in it but I would only bore you, so I'll just explain the basics. I'm 17, a very plain but intelligent boy. I've never had a girl friend, girls are way to much trouble why would anyone want one? I grew up with a mom and dad but we're far from a perfect family. My mother complains about everything while my father sits there and takes it in. Annoying as hell, watching them argue then two seconds later their tongues are down each others throats.

Anyways, I'm walking down this street with a letter in my hands for some girl. Shes quiet pretty but really lousy personality. Every chance she gets she puts you down. Well, this letter I'm taking her is one of those, "Why haven't you came to school my dear sweet child?" ones from your insane councilor. I didn't offer to drop it off to her but was volunteered, only because I live a half a block away from her and every time something had to be delivered to her right away I was the one who had to bring it to her. It was so annoying. When ever I went there I swear she put me down in 50 different ways.

She had two brothers. Two very 'different' brothers. One was one of those guys you think belonged in the mental ward and the other was a plain ass. No wonder she was the way she was. As I knocked on her front door I could hear all this music coming from the place then sure enough she opened the door,

"What do you want?"

"Psh. Like I want to be here," I handed her the paper, "but since I'm the closest neighbor in this whole goddamn place, I have the privilege of getting this to you." "Oh how fun." she examined the envelope then opened it.

Did I mention her name yet? Anyways, Its Temari. She had a tom boy attitude along with four pony tails, her hair was frizzy and she kind of just left it. If anyone were to run their fingers threw it, I'd imagine they'd have to yank them out. "So, their complaining about me not going to school. Have I missed anything? Any test coming up? I can pass those without even studying." she was right. She was a pretty smart girl. She was one of those people who didn't really have to be paying attention to something but know everything right on target.

"Theres a test coming up this Friday."

"In?"

"Math."

"Well then, I guess your helping me study for it."

"....I don't want to. I have enough things to do anyways." She leaned up against the door and smirked, "Like? Its not like you have a girl waiting for you or anything."

I rolled my eyes and kind of slouched over. She was right but I didn't want to help her study. That would take up to much brainpower and work. I hated work. No wonder I was flunking 5 subjects.

"So, are you going to help me or what?"

"I guess." I turned around to leave before she suddenly flung her body at my back. She loved to do that only because she knew I would never get a girl and thought I had this stupid crush on her. "Thank you for brining me my paper."

I turned red as I felt her up against me, "Ya...now let go. I have to get home."

She smiled as she let go, "See you tomorrow then."

I waved my hand then stuck them right into my pockets. God did she get to me. She loved to tease me. Ever since I meet her thats all she did. Tease, tease and did I mention tease? As I walked home I wondered how it would be to study with her. Would we be at my house or hers? I didn't feel very comfortable at her house, seeing as she threw herself at me and she had brothers who looked as though they could beat the shit outta me with one blow, and did she say tomorrow? "Hey Shikamaru."

I looked up to see a husky boy running toward me, "Hey Chouji."

he happen to be my best friend since we were little. We had another one, she happen to be a girl but I don't quiet remember her. She moved when we were 5. All I really remember was that she was bossy as hell.

"Come back from Temari's eh?"

"Yup."

"Did she happen to rub herself on you?"

I shook my head, "You make it sound more wrong then it actually is, you know that?"

I smiled, rubbered herself on me? Last week he said 'Did she fling her body on you?' and this week rub. Was he a joke.

"Have you seen Naruto lately?" Naruto was another one of my good friends. He was a real jokester but a really good pal.

"No. Not lately."

"Hey lets stop at the liquor store for chips," I nodded,

"Well, he got into a fight with that Sasuke." My eyes widened, "What? Why?"

"You know..." he kind of swayed to the side, "That Sakura girl. He couldn't tell me the whole story because his step Dad dragged him inside the house. All I got was 'That bastard Sasuke thought he could treat Sakura like dirt.'"

We walked inside the store while he told me the story,

"Naruto really should get over Sakura. She's never going to notice him."

"Ya but," Chouji was searching for BBQ layes, "he's liked her since 1st grade Shikamaru. How are you supposed to just toss your first love?"

"Troublesome."

Chouji let out a little laugh as he paid for his chips. "Alright lets go."

We made our way to my house talking about how much love, promises and forever were all a bunch of crap. We kept on with this conversation as we enterend my house then my mom busted threw the front door with a bunch of grocery's,

"Do you think you could help your dear old mother!?" I walked up to her and grabbed a few things setting them on the table, "Mom, tomorrow I might not come home right after school."

"And whys that Shikamaru?"

"I have to help a friend study."

"Boy or girl."

I rolled my eyes, "Mom..."

"Boy or girl?"

Chouji was smiling like crazy, "A girl."

My mother turned around fast like a cat on a mouse I almost fell outta my chair.

"A girl? Now Shikamaru...have I told you about the birds and the bees!?"

"Oh mom! God! Come on Chouji lets go."

Chouji laughed a little before following me out the front door, "See ya Mrs. Nara."

God, why did my mom have to go all out like that? She was, and I mean this, the most troublesome women you'll ever meet in your life time.

"Your moms funny."

"How?" I frowned,

"Shes got this very motherly like humor. Its quiet funny if you see it my way."

"Bah."

We walked up and down the block for a while before heading back to my place. We decided we'd call up good 'ol Naruto to see what he was up to.

"Hey Shikamaru."

There was my dad. You can tell her was half buzzed,

"Hey dad."

"Mom told me you were going to be at a girls tomorrow."

"Ya. But its only for study."

"Oh son," my dad stood up and patted me on my back, "Your what now 17? I know what boys like you your age do at a study. Ha ha ha."

Chouji was cracking up next to me as I got a horror look on my face,

"Whats wrong with you parents today?!"

"Now now...has your mother told you about the birds and the bees? Or...was it the bees and the birds..."

Chouji was still laughing as I snatched the phone and shoved him back outside.

"What the hells the matter with them today!? The birds and the bees!? The hell!"

Chouji was still laughing, "But your parents care so much about you! Little Shikamaru!"

"Shut up. Whats Naruto's number."

I pushed in the numbers and put the phone up to my ear,

"Hey...its not ringing."

"Oh hello? Shikamaru? Is that you? I'm sorry its Kurenai, your mothers friend. I guess I called you right when you were about to use the phone. Anyways, I'm glad you answered."

"Oh...how are you Kurenai? Hows Asuma?"

"Oh, hes fine...were both fine. Do you think I could speak to your mother very fast?"

"Yes. Let me get her."

"Who is that?" I coved the phone, "My moms friend. Hold on."

I walked inside and gave the phone to my mom then came right back outside as soon as I could.

"That was fast." Chouji smirked, "Ya? I hoped."

**&&&&&&&&&&**

If you like it please R&R The more reviews the faster I get the next chapter out!

_**Shikaino.**_


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